AUDIO - 001

[skyruleanhero]

[There is generic sound of movement as the device is shifted around before Link actually speaks. His voice is a bit strained and he sounds exhausted and confused.]

Right. Is this thing on? I think I figured out how to turn it on.

[There is more shuffling.]

I'll just assume it's on. Right. So. How do I put this.

[Link sighs and there is more shuffling.]

You know what? Here. See this? Not to insult anyone's aesthetic or what have you, but why shrunken heads? Behind the toilet? That talk? I mean I've seen some pretty weird things, but...

[Link pauses. There is general silence for a few seconds.]

You know what. Never mind. It's not that odd. I had another question anyway.

[There is more shuffling, followed by a deep breath.]

What is this? I don't know what this is. I mean it looks like a sink but the faucet is too high up and the knobs too low and there's a sink right there anyway. So why is there a second sink in a large box? Is this some sort of weird custom for you? If it is, please, explain. It's odd.

[More shuffling, and the sound of footsteps.]

Also I was wondering where the baths are? I haven't seen one yet. I'd kind of like to bathe at some point. Also, where are my weapons? I want those back. You know just in case something wants to, I don't know, attack me?

You do realize you have monsters in the halls. Disturbing, shuffling, monsters. They kind of look like corpses? So I'd like to have adequate protection. In my general experience monsters don't remain docile.

Actually they're never docile...this whole place is just strange.

[Link moves the device in his hands again. He's mumbling.]

Now how do I turn this--oh. There's no visual. Weird.

Comments

[ audio ]

[dogfighting]

[Alright, let's break this down piece by piece.]

The heads are a mystery, that sink is a shower, you can bathe in the shower, your weapons were taken by the crew, and the monsters probably won't hurt you. Hi, I'm Lily.

[ audio ]

[skyruleanhero]

Uh. Hi. I'm Link.

[The sink in a box is called a shower? Like a rain shower? Weird.]

Right. That makes sense. Still odd I mean where's the hot spring to soak in afterward. Unless you don't do that. I don't see why you wouldn't do that, it's enjoyable.

Do you know where I can get my weapons back? I don't trust monsters.

[They're never this quiet. Something is bound to happen.]

I'm not going to attack anything. You don't provoke walking corpses, that just screams stupid. I'd just feel better with my sword back. And my slingshot. And that whip too, actually.

I kind of feel naked without them.

[ audio ]

[dogfighting]

[Ahhh, fresh meat. So innocent.]

No hot springs, no weapons. I mean, you could ask for your stuff back, but you might not get it.

[Wait.]

... Your name's Link?

Re: [ audio ]

[skyruleanhero]

[Well that seemed like the stupidest thing he'd ever heard.]

Does the captain here prefer that we die?

[Sigh.]

Where do I go to request my weapons back? And yes, my name is Link. Why? Have you heard of me?

[Is there another Hyrulean on board this thing?]

[ audio ]

[dogfighting]

[She ignores everything else he said.]

Where are you from? Outset Island? Hyrule?

Re: [ audio ]

[skyruleanhero]

[He's completely taken by surprise.]

I'm from Skyloft, but most of our people are relocating back to the Surface now. We've only just started calling it Hyrule in honor of Hylia.

[ audio ]

[dogfighting]

[Lily actually bounces in excitement. Another Link! She always did like the Links.]

That's awesome! I used to know a Link. Or... three of them. Four? Four. No, three.

[Four.]

Re: [ audio ]

[skyruleanhero]

[Link is not sure what to make of this.]

Wait.

What?

[ audio ]

[dogfighting]

Oh! I used to know some different versions of you. One was from Outset, the others were from Hyrule, one was also a wolf...

TEXT

[talkback_hound]

u don't get weapons

Re: TEXT

[skyruleanhero]

[Oh. Cool. A text feature. Kind of like a letter, but not.]

i would much prefer to have them

it feels naked to at least not have a sword

TEXT

[talkback_hound]

train your body to be legally classified as a weapon

problem solved

TEXT

[skyruleanhero]

yes, sure, i'll get right on that

except

a body doesn't stop giant scorpions or moblins or bokoblins

or giant man eating plants

or a demon king who wants to eat the soul of my best friend and destroy the world

if i tried to do any of that without my sword i would've been dead

so excuse me if i feel naked without them and want my goddess damned weapons back

because i want to be able to protect myself

and others

isn't that a persons goddess given right

TEXT

[talkback_hound]

[Just wants to protect himself and others - the guy hits on a few noble points there, but since when does Hound concede on anything?]

just send Bruce Lee instead

TEXT

[skyruleanhero]

who the hell is bruce lee

[Link wonders if this is some sort of hero that he's never heard of.]

TEXT

[talkback_hound]

a human wepon

[He's not wrong.]

TEXT

[skyruleanhero]

yeah sure whatever

i still want my weapons back

[Link doesn't believe this guy. Girl? Whoever.]

[audio]

[butcherofblaviken]

The shades that do the housekeeping. You want to avoid them.

[Geralt had an adventure with the Nameless. It didn't go well.

[Pause.]

I'm Geralt a witcher. What are you called, elf?

[audio]

[skyruleanhero]

I'm not an elf. I'm a human?

[What was an elf anyway?]

My names Link, and I was planning on avoiding them anyway.

[He didn't want to provoke the things. They were docile for now, and he didn't want to see them when they weren't.]

[audio]

[butcherofblaviken]

My mistake. Usually only elves have pointed ears.

[Geralt doesn't think that Link is a human, but he's not going to argue the point. Link has pointed ears. He's an elf. Simple as that in Geralt's mind.]

Good. Beware their mouth-stitches coming undone. They become vicious.

[audio]

[skyruleanhero]

It's like having blue eyes or brown hair. We have pointed ears and rounded ears, but we're all human.

What's an "ehlf" anyway?

[Link doesn't recognize the word. It sounds weird]

Oh. Thanks. Good to know.

This is why I want my weapons back.

[audio]

[butcherofblaviken]

Huh. I didn't know that. Usually pointed ear means elf. Elves are another species of two-legged sentients. Trolls, humans, elves, dwarves, some harpies--we're all in the same bowl of species.

[Though Geralt has killed quite a few harpies and trolls. They're more often than not feral. Only rational monsters are to be spared.]

You and me, both.

[Geralt can't see Link, so he has to guess as to the elf's specialty.]

Archery, magic or swordsmanship?

[audio]

[skyruleanhero]

[Link has met a lot of creatures in his travels, but he's never heard of these before.]

I've never heard of any of those creatures. The only sentient beings I've ever seen are demons, spirits, Gorons, Sheikah, Kikwi, Mogma, Goblins, Parella and of course our Loftwings. Out of those into Sheikah and Demons looked remotely human.

I actually mistook Impa for human when I first met her until I remembered the Goddess sent all the humans into the Sky a thousand years ago.

[Finally, someone who knew what they were talking about!]

I'm a swordsman primarily. The Knight Academy mostly trains us in how to handle and fight with our Loftwings and in swordsmanship. I'm a pretty good archer though too. I made my first slingshot when I was six.

[Link laughs.]

At least until Headmaster Gaepora took it away! I got a new slingshot last year, and a bow! I gave it to Zelda, though. She's the better archer.

I'm also decent with a whip.

Actually it's the sword, slingshot, and whip that I'm missing. I divided the rest of my weapons between Zelda and Groose. I didn't need them anymore.

[audio]

[butcherofblaviken]

[Geralt takes out his notebook and writes down these species names. He's fascinated. He's an avid study of all manner of magical creatures, and the chance to increase the bestiary with new findings from strange lands is too much to give up.]

Hn. That's quite a few I've never heard of. I'll have to buy you a drink later and get your jaw working on those monsters.

[The rest was a blur of names, but what Geralt managed to pick from this encounter was that Link was a young member of an indeterminate species (either an elf or a pointed-eared subspecies of human) who was of the noble class and was trained with a variety of weapons. Interesting. Geralt felt he'd have to see this young man in action sometime.]

Hn. You've spent a lot of time training then. Are you a mercenary? Which crown do you work for?

[audio]

[skyruleanhero]

Mercenary? I'm not a mercenary.

[Link isn't really sure anyone on Skyloft is a mercenary.]

I don't work for a crown either. We've not really had a form of government for a thousand years.

[The islands were fairly peaceful and any disputes were often handled by the Knights Academy anyway.]

Although now that we're rebuilding our lives on the surface we might crown Zelda Queen. The surface isn't like Skyloft, after all, but that'll take years before it happens. We've only just begun to lay the groundwork.

[Link laughs a little. He's only trained a lot because there's not much else to do aside from fly.]

The Knight Academy mostly exists to make sure the people of Skyloft and the surrounding islands are safe. Children can fall off the islands if they're not careful, and if they don't have a Loftwing yet they'd die without Knights to catch them. Especially at night.

We don't really need to know how to fight. Skyloft's so peaceful.

[Link misses those days, when he didn't have to worry about anything.]

The training with swords is mostly a left over from the Great War, before we were sent into the sky, I think.